They Say Playing Partners Don't Care If You're Good Or Bad At Golf... Don't Believe It!

Golf is a selfish sport and players are only worried about their own game, right? But they do care who they play with if it might affect their score

Players putting
(Image credit: Golf Monthly)

I have always loved how golf is such an inclusive sport. It genuinely transcends generations. Handicaps give us the opportunity to play off an equal footing. The gender barriers are all but gone at most clubs. Dress codes have relaxed. Participation numbers have soared. So surely it shouldn’t matter if you play with someone off a high handicap index? 

Well in my experience the handicap index of your playing partners can make a difference to your scores, because golfers with more shots naturally take longer. In your group you’ll be hunting for more lost golf balls, they’ll be playing more provisionals off the tee, taking longer on the greens after missing putts. It takes more time to put together a high score, so in most cases accompanying them on a round of golf will take a lot longer.

Golfers walking on fairway

(Image credit: Golf Monthly)

Nonsense, I hear you cry! Playing off a high handicap doesn’t have to mean slow play, in fact it’s offensive to those playing off double digits who march their way around 18 holes in no time at all, and besides, there are plenty of very, very slow single figure golfers to contradict that theory. 

However, in my experience, who you play golf with does matter and it can have a profoundly positive or negative effect on your scores. Golf is an individual sport. Yes, we are out there for enjoyment, but ultimately if you are playing in a competition then you need to give yourself the best chance of scoring well. 

The Lower, The Better

Playing with golfers better than you will elevate your game. You will try to mirror their shots, learn from their skills, copy their course management strategies. Admittedly, playing with better players as a beginner can be daunting, a real mental challenge as you try to keep up with their skill level and scores, but there is no doubt that it will help you improve your game. You should try to keep an open mind and remember that most good players are very patient and will want you to succeed. 

As a good player you will usually have the luxury of choosing who you play with, you always win the popularity contest, but I also think that you have a duty and responsibility to encourage newcomers. It disappoints me the number of low handicappers who avoid teeing off with high handicappers, simply because they know their speed of play and the number of shots they take will be a distraction to their own games. What a very selfish standpoint I say. 

Golfers walking on fairway

(Image credit: Golf Monthly)

Choose Your Partners Wisely

I must confess that the one thing I have noticed from playing a lot of golf with high handicappers is that while these friends have steadily improved, I have actually gradually gotten a little worse with age. A large part of this is due to taking quality time out from serious competitive golf when my son was young. But there is a noticeable difference in the length I hit the ball compared to when I played with my county team compatriots regularly in my twenties and early thirties. 

There’s no doubt that when you play with better players, particularly longer hitters, you remember that to hit the ball further you have to swing faster. My tempo has slowed down because I have done nothing but play with women whose swing speed is at best average and at worst, darn right slow. With no good players to mirror I have slipped out of the habit of swinging  with speed!

Golfers walking on fairway

(Image credit: Golf Monthly)

Pace Of Play Matters

Even with the best will in the world it is nearly impossible to keep your focus if someone is taking 10 shots to your two to get to the green. The mind will wander. You will become distracted. Personally, my best golf is played at a fairly brisk pace, where I get to the ball, check my distance, pick my club, visualise the shot I want to play, pull the trigger and hit it. 

So next time you are putting your name down with a selection of playing partners ask yourself the question? How likely am I to play well in their company? Be honest and pick wisely.

Carly Cummins
Golf Monthly Contributor

Carly Frost is one of the golf industry’s best-known female writers, having worked for golf magazines for over 20 years. As a consistent three-handicapper who plays competitive club golf at Parkstone and the Isle of Purbeck courses in Dorset every week, Carly is well-versed in what lady golfers love. Her passion for golf and skill at writing combine to give her an unbeatable insight into the ladies game.  

Carly’s role at Golf Monthly is to help deliver thorough and accurate ladies equipment reviews, buying advice and comparisons to help you find exactly what you are looking for. So whether it’s the latest driver, set of irons, golf ball, pair of shoes or even an outfit, Carly will help you decide what to buy. Over the years she has been fortunate to play some of the greatest courses in the world, ranking Sea Island, Georgia, USA, among her favourite golf resorts. Carly's aptly-named son Hogan is already hitting the ball as far as mum and will undoubtedly be a name to watch out for in the future. Carly is a keen competitor and her list of golfing achievements are vast. She is a former winner of the South West of England Ladies Intermediate Championship, a three-time winner of the European Media Masters and she once beat an entire start-sheet of men to the title of Times Corporate World Golf Champion. She has played for both the Dorset and Surrey County Ladies first teams and is known for her excellent track record at matchplay.

Carly holds the ladies course record (68) at her home club Parkstone and her lowest competition round (seven-under-par 65) was carded in the pro-am of the Irish Ladies Open at Killeen Castle, playing alongside Solheim Cup superstar Anna Nordqvist. Although her current handicap index has crept up to 3.7 since Covid she has her sights firmly set on achieving that elusive scratch handicap and hopefully playing for her country when she’s 50.

Carly’s current What's In The Bag? 

Driver: Callaway Epic Max, 10.5° 

Fairway wood: TaylorMade SIM2, 15° 

Hybrids: Titleist TS2, 19°, 21°, 24° 

Irons: Mizuno JPX900, 5-PW 

Wedges: Cleveland RTX, 52°, 56° and 58° 

Putter: Scotty Cameron Futura X5

Ball: 2021 Callaway Ladies SuperSoft